Windows 8 basic package (human not included)

Windows 8
is one of the latest installments of the Windows computer. Steve Ballmer wants to convince everybody (aswell as himself) that it is the greatest installment. The computer has a crap terrible UI that looks like they took someone's cellphone's UI, then put it on a computer. The hardware is useless, as it doesn't come with a disk drive, speakers, and for the monitor to work, you need to pay Windows for an activation key. Oh yeah, they also removed the start button, pissing of 66.66% of the UnWorld.

Before starting the computer for the first time, you must hand over all your personal information to Windows so they can then give it to the NSA. Anonymous has critisised the feature the most.

The Stupid One recommends using Windows 8 computers. Many Guys have taken this quite seriously, and it became the official computer brand of the Stupidsm religion.

Basic Features

  • Play Shames with a maximum framerate of 5
  • Navigate a maze just to shut it down
  • Make your computer do a bunch of crazy stuff just to look at a picture
  • Browse the Internet with Windows Internet Explorer
  • Self-destruct button (in case all your programs are not responding)
  • 1.1MB of RAM
    Blue hal 9000 640x960



99% of the UnWorld who tried Windows 8 hated it within the first 5 seconds. The only people who liked it were Stupid, or Window's employees (because they had to like it to keep their job). 6 nations have already placed a ban on the computer. Biased Ratings gave it a 0.1/5 and Squadala Ratings gave it a -2.666/5. Notch in his latest update for Minecraft made it incompatible because he hated Windows 8 so much.

For some reason, Only one person likes it, And he lives in the middle of nowhere, Or maybe he does'nt even exists, Who knows?

Bill Gates, mad at how crappy this OS was, fired Ballmer and created the more successful Windows 8.1.

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