UnAnything Wiki
UnAnything Wiki

William "B.J." Blazkowicz is an American special secret agent, who one day escaped from The German Prison.

Could he NOT escape?


B.J. was a successfully secret agent of the USA. He always hated 007 from United Kingdom, so he wanted to prove that he is cooler. One day he decided to kill all Nazis. He first killed some guy with rocket launcher that made some kinda poison. Then he killed some ugly lady and stole herr plans. Then he killed some fatso with rocket launcher and a chaingun. Later he was arrested by Donald Duck. He was put in prison, but next day prison was ruined by B.J. from breaking out and shooting everything in sight (ouch). Then he was arrested by Malleo (who wasn't Mahzii yet) and was put to the Castle Wolfenstein. B.J. somehow escaped. However, he got arrested again by Hitler. B.J. was placed in THE GERMAN PRISON FOR 1337 YEARS!!! (But he broke out AGAIN on the fourth day, and assassinated Hitler)


The German Prison was full of mutants and crazy guys. B.J. was held in camera with one Nazi soldier. He was killed and B.J. got a pistol. Then he somehow destroyed half of prison and a general and some crazy shit doctor. Later he killed Hitler (!) when he was in indestructible (!!) Mecha-suit (!!!); Everybody ran away and B.J. came out of prison.

Later B.J. became the Hero of Koridai and had chance to play war with Chuck Norris. Then he was thrown in the pit of DOOM, and he was never seen since. (well, a few times, but more on that later) The Ancient Geeks believe he is still alive.