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Movie poster from around 5007.

UnAnything: The MOVIE is a movie created by the UnAnything Team in collaboration with Gabe The Unknown featuring Captain 0, Captain 15, and many more.

It released in theaters January 31st 5008 after some time in production. It involves Captain 0 as he tries to save the world from imminent destruction from the Satanist Empire as Evil Captain 0 (played by WaCaptain 0) and Captain 1 plan to destroy it with an intergalactic mallet hammer. It was released to critical acclaim, grossing over 400,000,000,000 UnDollars in intergalactic theaters AND DVD (or illegal Blu-Ray) release. After its initial run, it was recorded as the highest grossing movie ever, with the second being another movie the UnAnything Team and Gabe The Unknown called Gabe: The Movie.

There is an sequel called UnAnything: The MOVIE 2: The Empire Did Some Weird Crap Again. However, this will be the final movie in the trilogy as the UnAnything Team will not make a third movie in the trilogy stating that money constraints have limited them. Until further notice. no third movie will me made.

Plot

One day, Captain 0 was drinking some coffee and was taking a walk around Earth. Suddenly, a giant machine resembling a mallet hammer appears in the sky, followed by gunfire from spaceships. What has happened?

Captain 0 tries to get a better look, and realizes they are from the Satanist Empire. The armada are being controlled by none other than Evil Captain 0 and Captain 1, who are planning to invade and destroy Earth using a intergalactic mallet hammer (and destroy Captain 0 once and for all). Captain 0 is then knocked out for a few minutes and then wakes up again (of course). He gathers a resistance group to fight against the armada and destroy the mallet hammer, being lead by Light Captain 1, Captain 15, Captain 1,000 (for good measure and praise from God) and Captain 10 (just cause' he likes games and potentially useful).

At first, they devise a plan to reprogram an SNES to play a hacked version of Mario so bad the heat produced from producing the graphics for the game will be sufficient for powering a mega-mini laser that can destroy the mallet hammer and the army once and for all. They put Captain 1,000 in charge of literally trying to get God to help in their fight, and Captain 10 in playing the horrible game sufficient to power the mega-mini laser, and Captain 15 and Light Captain 1 to lead the resistance army against the armada and temporarily shut down the mallet hammer to get time.

However, while fighting, Captain 15 is suddenly struck by a parachute bomb and dies. She tells Captain 0 to go on and find Chuck Norris to advise Captain 0 on using a different plan. By then, the mallet is almost hitting Earth.

Captain 0 decides that instead of reprogramming an SNES to play a shitty game to power a laser, but to rather reprogram the SNES to become the laser itself. Only the wise Chuck Norris knows how to do so, and so being an Undefeatable himself he decides to visit Chuck Norris to ask him to tell him how to program an SNES to become a laser. Chuck Norris says this:

" To make your SNES become a laser, first you must play Super Mario World so badly that it switches to a control panel. There, you shall copy and paste this code I shall bless you with. After that, you will have a blessed Mega Laser. "
  —Chuck Norris

By then, it is almost too late. The mallet hammer is almost touching the UnWorld, and the army has shot everything and bombed every building. Captain 1 and Evil Captain 0 mock Captain 0, saying "Not so powerful now, huh Captain 0?" or "lOoK aT mE, i'M cApTaIn 0 aNd I aM aN aSsHoLe!!" However, Captain 0 fights back, saying that he will fucking kill them all. He brings out his weird Super Famicom playing Super Mario World and orders Captain 10 to play it so badly, and he does so. It switches to the control panel after a few minutes and Captain 0 pastes the code in. As the laser rapidly charges up, Captain 1 and Evil Captain 0's final words (in this movie) are:

" Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh sheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeyit "
  —Captain 1 and Evil Captain 0

The laser shoots at the armada, and it hits the mallet hammer so hard it has a big explosion, killing anyone caught in the explosion. The force of the laser was so hard, everyone who was dead was literally revived with the life force of someone who died in the explosion. Captain 15 gives her thanks to Captain 0, they all celebrate with a dance, and everyone lived happily ever after.

Development

Early concepts for the movie were made around 5004 after UnAnything: The Series was becoming a bit boring. People on the UnAnything Team agreed to collaborate with Gabe The Unknown to create what would become UnAnything: The Movie. Gabe and the UnAnything Team previously had collaborated together in the making of Gabe: The Movie, which was a huge success and forever cemented their partnership when making UnAnything movies.

At first, Malleo and Weegee were involuntarily acting as Captain 0 and Captain 10, and they failed BADLY. The UnAnything Team was requesting for the real Captain 10 and Captain 0 to come on scene, however there was one problem: They were copyrighted by a fake company made by Wario and had to wait until the company was taken down. However, a day later, it did get shut down (because Wario sucks), so they were able to invite Captain 0 and Captain 10 onto the team.

" Once upon a time, Captain 0 and Captain 10 were walking around when suddenly a car exploded. Everyone was panicking, breaking glass and looting every store. What had happened?

Ever since that day, Captain 0 and Captain 10 are solving mysteries around Earth, solving disappearances and leading police investigations. One day, a mysterious mass murder happened at a Bank of UnAmerica in.. well, UnAmerica. Can they find the culprit and sentence him to DIE?

"
  —UnAnything: The MOVIE plot, before it was rewritten

However, the plot was too janky and didn't fit well with Pre-Critics (Captain 0 isn't meant to be a detective), and so MountWario remade the plot into what it is today. (I don't remember having any involvement -MountWario) (That's because we drugged you, Mount -DeeDaaDooDOS)

Early scenes were produced around early 5007, with many of them having many bloopers that a separate bloopers DVD was created called UnAnything: The BLOOPERS. This was when they let on Captain 1,000 and 15 on the scene and expanded the plot more. Evil Captain 0 and Captain 1 offered to stop doing evil for a bit to produce the movie, and all seemed good, but there was still one problem: Chuck Norris. You see, the UnAnything Team wanted to invite Chuck Norris on set, however he was too busy debating with the Undefeatables and had to finish his SPAGHET. He finally stopped the debate and finished his SPAGHET, so he could act for the scenes and be a supporting character in the movie. Cameos were made of Mario and Luigi, but Nintendo had copyright and they were sad. However, Nintendo was dead due to the apocalypse, so they didn't mind that and put cameos in. They also put Sonic too, but who cares?

By January 5008, all the scenes were finished and compiled together into UnAnything: The MOVIE with Michael Bay explosions and high-end SFX, and they were ready to release it to the masses. UnAnything: The MOVIE was released to critical acclaim, amassing around 400,000,000,000 in total (including DVD and illegal Blu-ray release) and put Captain 0 in the UnHall of Fame.

Trivia

  • Production almost halted indefinitely due to the Satanist Empire Siege of '08, which resulted in Evil Captain 0 being temporarily abdicated. The problem was resolved though.
  • Mr. Nintendo almost sued the UnAnything Team, but realized he would lose anyways.
  • Malleo and Weegee actually didn't do any acting.
  • The "critics" were zombies from Biased Ratings, who were stupid anyways and didn't even talk.
  • It was given five star reviews by everyone that was not a dumb zombie, even Captain 1 had to rate it 5 stars.
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