Twinkie the Kid
Twinkie the kid revenge.jpg

He has and enough of this union Communist $h!t that killed him!

Gender: Male
Hair color: Brown
Eye color: Blue
Species: Twinkie
Home: Homeless
Death: He is immortal
Dislikes: Unions
Education: Unknown
Occupation: Awesome
Known For: Being Awesome
UnRank: 100,000
Cquote1.png I will rise again! Cquote2.png
—'Twinkie the Kid'''Twinkie the Kid is the mascot for Twinkies, Hostess's golden, cream-filled snack cakes. He is a registered trademark of Hostess Brands. He has appeared on product packaging, in commercials, and as collectible related merchandise. He is also ABSOLUTELY FREAKING AWESOME!


The brilliant folks at Hostess were watching an Old Western Film and thought, "hey, let's make a Twinkie cowboy because we can!" So they did, and it was a major success. Many people thought that he was awesome. He was the greatest hero of the food mascots, and was known as an United States of UnAmerica icon. Then, November 16, 2012 came by.


Hostess, one of UnAmerica's greatest companies, filed for bankruptcy because of the baker's unholy demands. Another factor was Barack Obama's evil wife, Michele Obama, wanted to see all unhealthy food companies die off, because she wants to force children to became physically active. (For further reading, see Michele Obama's Big Evil Plan.) Twinkie the Kid was homeless, and had nowhere to go. He sweated vengeance on us fallen mascot friends, and promised to stop at nothing until they were avenged. He is currently in hiding from the IRS, and is planning his revenge. Just be warned, he is currently a terrorist because of that day... :O

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