
Toiley on stage
Toilmere "Toiley" Thompson Paper is a renowned, inadequate international actor, comedian, celebrity, basement dweller and anthropomorphic loo roll renowned by many for his inspirational deliveries of support to, fundamentally, mere, spoilt neonates, whom upon nativity plausibly only ever just managed to fully comprehend what an iPad was.
Life[]
Mr. Paper first lived his life in the form of a softwood tree upon the creation of the forest; why his supposed biological parents chose to name him after that of a toilet remains unclear. Life was relatively normal for Paper until a gathering of present-day loggers deforested the forest he was located in and alas, Paper was chopped down. Industrialists who engaged in the production of paper altered his appearance and overall anatomy evidently, and for the same reason as to why the sky is blue, the manufacturer of Paper fastened a pair of previously amputated arms with pierced poles inside around the surface of his figure; it is unknown why the manufacturer did this. Paper then proceeded to abscond rapidly from the industrial unit he was mutated into a piece of toilet roll in, miraculously with the lack of any feet.
Paper pounded erratically around the streets searching for a position of employment, as the local pedestrians of the area were questioning their mere sanity owing to the fact that their ocular systems were perceiving a living roll of toilet paper. After three days, Paper inadvertently plummeted down into the sewers where he would remain for several months, until he stumbled across an abandoned, fragmented pipe. He climbed through the pipe, whilst of course having to circumvent the malodorous lumps of feces that hindered his progress. Paper finally emerged into a stranger's toilet deserted, oddly enough, in the centre of the basement after five weeks of exertion. He then started to explore the depths of the stranger's basement, searching for convenient resources he could make use of. He then discovered the stranger's old, forsaken iPad that the stranger had in fact, robbed from the local retail store. Paper self-taught himself how to utilize the device.
It wasn't too much of a matter of time until Paper brought to light an application called 'YouTube'. Becoming imminently engrossed by the app, Paper opted for beginning his career on YouTube under the alias "Toiley", and thus, he did it. Paper started off by uploading videos to the website that focus around cheesy, inadequate pieces of witticism surrounding toilets. fecal matter and all of that kind of stuff. His newfound viewers (most of which were presumably typical underage kiddie-winky-tinky-winkies) were immediately enthralled by these uploads, motivating Paper to upload videos that featured him showing appreciation to the most supreme of his virtually half-baked fandom. Paper's popularity increased substantially to the point where he was reportedly (and likely ostensibly) featured on America's Got Talent to, evidently, great prosperity. Paper as of today continues to thrive in the art of pleasantry surrounding what he was invented to cleanse, and deeds that have yet to come...