What's that? You don't agree with Her Excellency, President for Life Hikari Horaki's official policies? You're trying to undermine Cuba and her precious democracy, aren't you?
TRAITORS TO THE REVOLUTION! – YANKEE IMPERIALIST PIGS! GUARDS, GET 'EM!!!
What's that? You don't agree with Her Excellency, President for Life Hikari Horaki's official policies? You're trying to undermine Cuba and her precious democracy, aren't you?
TRAITORS TO THE REVOLUTION! – YANKEE IMPERIALIST PIGS! GUARDS, GET 'EM!!!
From Left to Right : Hikari Horaki , Fidel Castro Gary Oldman
Note: For those without comedic tastes, the so-called "experts" at Wikipedia have a real article on the Cuban UnMario mascots. Apparently, some have different names but oh well. Hikari Horaki, Che Guevara, Fidel Castro, Gary Oldman.
The UnOffical Cuban UnMario Mascots are 3 evil guys who work for the Soviet Union, and occasionally help Joseph Stalin in his quest to spread Communism around the world. The group was formed after Bill Cosby refused their application due to Horaki's, Guevara's, Castro's, and Oldman's communist agenda, and the fact that Oldman shot John Fitzgerald Kennedy in cold blood in front of Jackie Chan.
The Tension between the Official Mascots and the UnOffical Cuban Mascots began when Castro shot Ronald McDonald in the leg over the naming rights of the UnMario Mascot Trademark. This dispute erupted into a fist fight with Horaki and Oldman being repeatedly punched and sat on by the Evil Guy only to be ended when Che added Unofficial to the Group Name at the Request of Bill Cosby. After that things were going well until Che Guevera was shot dead in Bolivia by CIA agents in 1967. As of 1967, the mascots are currently planning their revenge on the CIA by joining forces with Joseph Stalin and the KGB as well as infiltrating the UnMario Mascots by pretending to be George Bush's Family Members.
List of Mascots[]
- Hikari Horaki
- Gary Oldman
- Fidel Castro
- Che Guevara (Killed in Action)
Gallery[]
