Full name: Teddie
Gender: Male
Hair color: Blue
Eye color: Black
Birthdate: Bearly known.
Species: Bear
Height: 130 cm
Home: You're grandma's TV
AKA: クマ
Likes: Every women in existence
Dislikes: Kanji
Powers: Knowing everything about everyone
UnRank: 8347

Teddie is an omniscient bear of useless and only somewhat helpful information. Except when he isn't a bear, then he's a human. Teddie is best known for his bear suit which he SWEARS doesn't make him a furry. Ok bear enough he was born as a bear suit.

In 2009 disguised as an empty bear suit snuck into Mario's house took hold of the Enclosed Instruction Book and started photo-copying the pages. However on the last page Mario came out of the printer and performed seven Roundhouse Kicks on Teddie, launching him into Dimension 666. But Teddie can summon TV's on demand, and escaped with all 9001 copied pages. However Teddie lacked the foresight to write down all the 4th dimensional part of the Enclosed Instruction Book. That holds all the good stuff and all the things needed to kill everyone.

As you can see, he's really stupid.

Shadow Teddie

Shadow Teddie

Look how cute he is with that smile!

SPOILER hotdogs and sandwiches

Shadow Teddie withholding the truth

Teddie decided to become edgy once and form Shadow Teddie because the well known fact that all bears have existential crisises. This thing later becomes his super lame bearsona Kintoki-Douji. He one time leaked some information the 2 best foods to ever exist. To be bearfectly honest, Shadow Teddie looks cooler than the other Teddies because of his spiked hair.


It's like teddie, except less annoying

Gender: Male
Sexuality: 50% Gay
Hair color: Yellow
Eye color: Unnatural shade of blue
Species: Human
Height: 5'7"
Home: The UnWorld
AKA: 熊田
Likes: Seducing every women in existence
Dislikes: Still Kanji
Occupation: Wal-Mart Employee
Powers: Being the second most handsome man to ever exist
UnRank: 8347

Cool Facts With Teddie!

All toasters toast toast

Example of one of his useless facts.

oh yeah there's teddie facts. It's kinda like a Chuck Norris fact except not as good. He makes up for this fact by having a bearzillion facts. They go into the 2 categories: Useless and Beary Helpful.


Ted is like Teddie, he's a human and still thinks of himself as a bear. It's weird to make human puns as a human. The humanity if humans made human puns.

Teddie wanted to be a human, so he called up Gruntilda and she agreed to make him a human, However he needed to steal the handsomeness from someone. So he stole it from the Glitch Gremlin, and never returned it because he's that badass, w00t!

He also gets none of the ladies, so what was even the point in the first place? Well you see, he uses this power to make every other guy around him feel bad about himself. You probably feel bad for not being as handsome as him.


Ted cross-dressing.

Wario soon noticed Ted, who was cross-dressing at the time. Wario got furious because Wario's supposed to be the master of disguise. They decided to have a disguise competition and Ted won at being the better master of disguise for his cross-dressing still being better than anything Wario could do. But then Wario shot Ted with his astronaut gun, so that makes them even.

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