Pizza!
Pizza pasta put it in a... wait, howzit go again?
Pizza is a foodstuff thing that looks like what you would happen if you threw a bunch of foodstuffs together and flattened it with a steamroller. Pizza originated in the Mushroom Kingdom ("Hey, call us Italy for once!") and unexpectedly blew up because that's how it should be. Pizza is often eaten by groups of friends at parties, who cut it in pieces and then barbarically kill each other for the final slice.
Pizza is good because you could put basically put anything on it, except for pineapple. Pizza is prepared by many chefs, most of them Italian, others robotic. We like to call these guys, "professionals" after Chuck Norris. Many people entrust these guys on delivering that Italian awesomeness/tastiness.
Pepperoni pizza.
Hazards[]
Pizza is suprisingly infamous for the sheer amount of hell it delivers sometimes.
"Last Slice" Conflict[]
Pizza is good... too good, actually. You see, pizza is typically enjoyed with friends, as we mentioned earlier. The groups of people who get together to eat pizza tend to act a bit... batty, when the pizza is down to one slice. They tend to get into literal clashes over this, and the ordeal can cause physical and emotional damage.
Nausea[]
Pizza can also make you vomit in a number of ways. For one, the toppings can play a role in this, pineapple on pizza in particular. Mario's Pizza always has some sort of poison in it that can make your horrifically ill, but that's poison so it's to be expected. There's also pizza from Brazil, which is so unconventional you may vomit from looking at it! Vinny learnt this the hard way.
Aggresive Pizza[]
Oh the horror!
The pizza is aggressive.
The most dangerous thing about pizza is that, under certain cir-cum-stances, it will become berserk, typically flying around and chopping people's heads off. Most infamously is an incident where an aggresive pizza killed Hugh Neutron, and later Jimmy Neutron, in the former's failed hostage attempt thing. This almost got pizza banned, but then it was revealed that the pizza was turned aggresive because the cheese was made with curdled Egg Nog, and now cheese can only be made with milk and variations thereof. Mario is known to have utilized this power in order to kill Somebody, but the cir-cum-stances of this feat are currently unknown. This event is known to have significantly aided pizza-control activists in their push for pizza regulation, but was criticized as a talking point as there is very little confirmed information about Mario's impressive display of Italian sustenance manipulation.
Final Kill Count[]
KILL COUNT: 400
THE PIZZA WILL BECOME AGGRESSIVE.
KILL COUNT: 400
THE PIZZA WILL BECOME AGGRESSIVE.
The Pizza Quality Index []
The Pizza Quality Index (Or PQI) was created by chef Giorno Giovanna to rate each place's usefulness to society. Countries with high ratings on the PQI are designated as "holy zones", "sanctuaries" or "areas that must be protected at all costs", while those that score very low on the PQI face heavy sanctions (until they improve their pizza), or are destroyed entirely.
Current Index[]
- Italy
- France
- Spain
- Teletubby Land
- Japan
- Soviet Russia
- (Somwhere in the top 50.: Nacho Fries)
- Piramidia (27th when Peppino was a bambino because his family used to have their buisness in Oasis Springs)
- North Korea
- Seattle
- Second to last. Dimension 666
- Last place. Hawaii
Trivia[]
- The first people who tasted pizza and didn't die are the Teen Titans and Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.
This Italian dish can be bought or cooked everywhere in the world. My personal recipe calls for a thick crust, pizza sauce, mozzarella, pepperoni, basil, bacon, mushrooms and sausage. Smother all of that on the pizza and chuck that bad boy into the oven and let it cook for around 15 minutes at most. You won't regret the end result!
This Italian dish can be bought or cooked everywhere in the world. My personal recipe calls for a thick crust, pizza sauce, mozzarella, pepperoni, basil, bacon, mushrooms and sausage. Smother all of that on the pizza and chuck that bad boy into the oven and let it cook for around 15 minutes at most. You won't regret the end result!