New Teammates is Season 1 Episode 2 of The Super Wario Bros. Wah-wah Show!
- Donkey Kong
- Homer Simpson
- New Mario
- New New Mario
- Bob The Builder
- Dr. Eggman
- Insane Guy (KIA)
- Barack Obama
- Dry Bones
- Some tiny moron that nobody cares about
- Angry German Kid
- Ludwig von Koopa
- Fire Plantio
- Homestar Runner
- Black Mage
- Gay Luigi
- George W. Bush
- Shy Guy
WALUIGI: What you watchin', boss?
WARIO: The Super Wario Bros. Wah-wah Show.
WALUIGI: Isn't that our show?
WARIO: Break the fourth wall again and you're fired. Hear me?
WALUIGI: Fine... Hey, weren't we supposed to get new teammates today?
WARIO: Oh, you're right! I almost forgot! Let me set things up...
SOME TINY MORON THAT NOBODY CARES ABOUT: Sir.
DRY BONES: Yes?
SOME TINY MORON THAT NOBODY CARES ABOUT: Are we going to get new teammates or what?
DRY BONES: AHM WORKIN' AWN IT!
SOME TINY MORON THAT NOBODY CARES ABOUT: Uh, no need to be autistic, sir.
DRY BONES: Oh, sorry about that. Anyways, I got 10 candidates for new teammates so far. I need to interview them to see if they are good or not. I'm still not done searching yet, though. I'll start interviewing when I have 20 candidates.
SOME TINY MORON THAT NOBODY CARES ABOUT: Alright, sir. Good luck.
DRY BONES: Thanks.
SOME TINY MORON THAT NOBODY CARES ABOUT walks out of the office.
WARIO and WALUIGI are near their front door. They have built up some sort of stand where the interviews happen. Their first candidate walks up to the stand.
NEW MARIO: Uh, hello there. You two must be Wario and Waluigi, right?
WARIO: Yes, we are! You are currently participating in an interview to see if you qualify for being a Drop Dead Wario Teammate!
NEW MARIO: Well, I know that. I have seen your advertisements all around the Internet.
WARIO: Well, alright then. Man, I really need to take a dump. Waluigi, you handle this.
WALUIGI: Uh, okay...
WARIO goes back inside.
WALUIGI: Alright, let's see... Tell us about yourself!
NEW MARIO: Well, I am basically just like Mario. I can use all the power-ups that he can use, like some people could do. I serve as the replacement for him sometimes. I love breakdancing and playing basketball. I actually am really good at basketball! I was the reason my own team won! I died once while replacing Mario, but I got revived later on. I also have a brother called New Luigi. He served as the replacement for Luigi. I don't think he knows that I am alive, though. I haven't seen him in a long time. I did hear that your group killed him, but that could just be a rumor.
WALUIGI: 'K then... (Good thing he doesn't know that we actually killed him.) What weapons do you use?
NEW MARIO: I have a variety of Darksabers. The main Darksaber that I use is the Blue Darksaber. The interesting part is that only I can wield it. Anyone else who tries to wield it will literally die instantly on the spot. No one knows why, though. I also kept some power-ups that I collected, so there's that.
WALUIGI: You sound pretty cool. You're in!
NEW MARIO: Already? Sweet!
WARIO comes out of the front door.
WARIO: Man, that was a good dump! Wait, what's happening?
WALUIGI: New Mario is in the group!
WARIO: Well, he better be good.
NEW MARIO: You don't have to worry about a thing, Wario.
WALUIGI: Yeah! He has this awesome Darksaber that kills anyone else that tries to wield it!
WARIO: Alright, then.
NEW MARIO enters the house. I'm not gonna bother doing the rest of the interviews, because there were a LOT of candidates. Instead...
The rest of the candidates sucked ass. That's all you need to know.
This scene is basically the same thing as the last one, except it's the Koopa Dynastia version. I'll tell you who got in.
The rest of them sucked ass, so yeah.
In WARIO's house, the Drop Dead Wario Team is having a meeting about the new members.
WARIO: So guys, do you like the new members?
HOMER SIMPSON: Yeah. They seem pretty cool.
WALUIGI: Daisy scares me a little bit...
DONKEY KONG: Come on Waluigi, don't be a pussy.
INSANE GUY: YEAH!! SHE NOT DAT BAD!! SHE GOT DAT ASS!!!
DAISY: NIGGA, WHAT?
INSANE GUY: UhHhHhHh...
DAISY obliterates INSANE GUY.
WARIO: Dude, not cool! That was one of our members!
DAISY: So? Why the hell did you hire him, anyways? He doesn't have any powers, he's insane, and he's offensive.
WARIO: Good point.
WALUIGI: I thought he had mind powers or something!
BOWSER: He's insane, Waluigi. He thinks he has mind powers, but he actually does not.
WALUIGI: Good point as well...
WARIO: Well, I hope you guys enjoy it here! Hahahahahahahahahaha! We are going to win against the Koopa Dynastia for sure!
Meanwhile at the Koopa Dynastia base, the Dynastia is having a meeting as well.
DRY BONES: Well, nice to meet you all, everyone.
LUIGI: Yeah! I'm tired of those Drop Dead Fags!
SOME TINY MORON THAT NOBODY CARES ABOUT: Hahaha, yeah! Those fags can drop dead for sure, am I right?
GAY LUIGI: Uh, guys? Can we stop using the word "fags" please? It's really offensi-
ANGRY GERMAN KID: I WILL SMAAAAAAAASH MY KEYBOARD ON THOSE MOTHERFUCKERS!
WAWARIO: I will defeat my clone, even if it kills me!
DRY BONES: Alright, alright, enough chitter-chatter. It's time to prepare for the next battle.
SOME TINY MORON THAT NOBODY CARES ABOUT: Yeah! And this time, we will win!
The screen fades to black. White text appears.
TEXT: To be continued...
- Many critics found this episode not too good, and not too bad. It's just boring. They were glad that Insane Guy died, however. Nobody likes him.
- This episode has been labeled as a filler episode.
- It was not as popular as the first episode.
- This is the first episode of the remake that is not a remake of an episode from The Super Wario Bros. Wah-wah Show! (the original version from the UnMario Wiki).
- This episode also appears on the UnMario Wiki: New Teammates