Mr. Nintendo was one of the strangest humans that ever existed. He was born about 1,999,999 BC in the UnWorld during ancient times, and then he grew into an adult in a few hours. He was the founder of Nintendo, the greatest shames company of all time.
Mr. Nintendo's entire life took place over the course of a single day. He is currently the only recording of such a case. After he was born, he grew up in a matter of hours, and he came across an old toothpick factory. Chuck Norris walked up, and kicked it. It became the first ever shames factory. Mr. Nintendo reached into his wallet, and pulled out zero thousand UnDollars in cash (that equals about $24,000,000,000 in today's currency).
After another 12 hours, Mr. Nintendo was middle aged. He quickly hired Shigeru Miyamoto to help him run Nintendo, and they made the Nintendo Entertainment System. They managed to make the shame Super Mario Bros. After this, Mr. Nintendo was an old man.
Mr. Nintendo died of old age 24 hours after he was born. He was buried in an unknown part of Japan, and a funeral service was held for such a great man. Today, there is a statue in his honor in every major city in the world. We will all remember the story of Mr. Nintendo. You know, for about five minutes. Then we'll all go and eat some Turtle Soup.
HEY! I KNOW THIS IS HERE!!! WHO WROTE THIS SLOP?!
I'm in big trouble...