Minecraft Villagers are a type of creature created by Notch when he created Minecraft due to a mental breakdown he was having at the time. They were peaceful at first, but after suffering for so long they declared war on Notch.


The Villagers

Two Villagers having a conflict about a cup.

Minecraft Villagers look like square, brown Squidwards who always have their arms tucked into each other. They make congested noises, though to them it sounds completely normal. They have really tiny legs and can seeminly open and close doors with their noses. They look similar to a Minecraft Witch, but they can't do anything special.

Life of a Villager

Villagers trade with a currency called "emeralds" which have no other purpose. They live in (sometimes) small villages, where they are kind of stupid, but also really passive. The most violent fight ever recorded between two villagers was when one moved the other's Diet Doctor Kelp, and he said "oh, I'm so sorry sorry" (yes he says it twice). Villagers can also (if their village is big enough) make devices out of villager bodies, and they have used this in the war against Notch (though the only helicopter they had got blown up by their own missile). However, the abuse comes from the players. They will storm villages, either capturing and farming villagers, or just raiding the village and killing them. Sometimes they'll even stick around and form their own town, only to have the villagers trapped and unable to do anything except make "good" offers or die.

The War Against Notch

They declared war on Notch after so much abuse from players. They lost the war horribly since Notch can literally control what they can and cannot do. However, Notch gave them one day where all the players were villagers to try to compensate for it. The Villagers didn't accept that.

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