Fuck you All Land Mainty!
—Lazlo, before turning into Satan
Lazlo (actual name Lylat, but executive meddling renamed it to Lazlo) is some idiot monkey that was kidnapped and forced to live on currently lives in Donkey Kong Country. But don't underestimate him just because he's only 50 UnRanks below Maggie Pesky!
He's an excellent camper (whatever the hell that means), has OVER 9000 jobs within his lifetime (is he an overworking slave?) and plus, HE'S A VAMPIRE THAT CAN TURN INTO SATAN! Wow! Not even Rambamboo can do that! (What can Rambamboo do anyway?)
History[]
While his backstory is largely unknown (probably for a good reason), Lazlo used to be a chaotic and destructive camper at Camp Kidney, driving Scoutmaster Lumpus insane with his pyromaniacal activities. Lumpus got so annoyed at Lazlo that he pulled a Chuck Norris and FALCON PUNCHED him into a galaxy far, far away which led him to finding out about Team Star Fox. It all went downhill from there.
Fox McCloud, being the idiot that he is, somehow trusted Lazlo enough to let him join the Star Fox team. You can probably guess how well that went, seeing as he euthanized Krystal within about 1.2 milliseconds (Good riddance).
This of course led to Lazlo having even more fun with ASPLOSIONS than ever before, spamming Smart Bombs everywhere he goes. This of course meant a national shortage and Lazlo was promptly kicked out the 82393938394th time he caused a shortage. Maybe being part of Team Star Fox was actually worth it for him because thanks to some lanky bitch named Wolf something something he learnt how to turn into Satan.
Later in his lifespan, Wario successfully stalked and hunted down Lazlo because of course he needed more slaves to work at WarioWare, Inc. a.k.a. Hell. He actually enjoyed making microshames for a while, especially since Dribble's existence made his dong expand. But later he got tired, and put his Satan transformation skills to the test by successfully killing Wario. I'm getting a sense of deja vú.
He later returned to Camp Kidney, but not for long as Scoutmaster Lumpus reported him to Prickly Pines' Juvenile Detention Center, getting him rightfully (or maybe wrongfully) arrested. Though later, Diddy Kong confused him for one of his slaves and (illegally) took him back to Egypt, which leads to where he is today.
Trivia[]
- For some reason despite being a massive hater of Krystal (who gets equally as crapsack art), Lazlo enjoys viewing not so family friendly art of Dribble in his free time.
- He has a show on Crap Network called Camp Lazlo, however literally no one that isn't called Maggie Pesky likes it.
Olzalaruzarpmacarupmak
Turns into Satan.