Me am brave warrior. Me greatest warriors of all cats. Me wuz once tiny baby kitten. But then me grow big and strong because of diet, exercise, and steroids (mostly steroids)! Now me humble protector of all that is good, and destroyer of all that is evil and dogs (mostly dogs).
Me wuz born on great rock in faraway land. Me from yes big tribe of warrior cats. But then me tribe attacked my mongol savages. Me the only survivor. Me was taken in by great Wise Man and trained in all the meme-fus. Then me set out for revenge.