- AND I WAS LIKE BABY! BABY! BABY! BLAARGGHH!!!
- —''', Justin Bieber performing in front of the crowd while throwing up!
|Justin "idiot" Bieber|
Just..don't say anything...
You know what? Maybe it doesn't have a biological gender.
|Death:||Killed by all 9 billion of his haters, even though there are only 7 billion on teh Earth|
|Occupation:||Pathetic Canadian Singer|
|Known For:||Being Stupid|
|UnRank:||-∞x OVAH 9000|
Justin Drewdiot Beaver (Known as Justin Bieber in some areas. SOME.) is a stupid tomgirl Canadian singer, failure, and pure idiot. Speaking of which, most believe he isn't even Canadian. Many people hate him/her... actually, let's just call this person "it" because it doesn't even look human. except for some super stupid teenage girls, and it's more moronic than The Scratch Cat and George W. Bush combined.
Born in the small town of Lozertinville in the state of New Lozerton, Justin lived a boring life until his stupid mother started posting videos of him on YouTube of it
yelling singing like a complete moron and apparently, some n00b liked it. He sent him a contract to keep singing. he did and is now rich. At age 12, he went to the bathroom to supposedly pee for the first time, and that was when he found out he didn't have any reproductive organs at all. Not even an anus. (This might explain why he's always FULL OF CRAP!!! Get it? :D) This caused him to fall into a depression. He was then put in an unknown mental hospital. It was confirmed that Bieber was in fact, not a human being. A year later, an anonymous redditor posted a photo of a girl-like creature doing some weird stuff. When Bieber was released from the mental hospital, he saw the photo and publicly announced that it was him in the picture. Which no one cares so what he did to be popular was to post a video of him singing in a high-pitched voice. His now its voice was so deafening that people gave all of their money just to make it stop uploading videos of it screaming. Because all of the money people gave to him, its wrote its own songs (You didn't think this humanoid creature could get any worse, did ya?)and paid music record labels so that his song could be heard from the media. A noob discovered his deafening voice and gave him a contract.
After That Hood in the Child Life
The n00b sent him a contract to keep singing. He did and is now rich. This made him think that he is the coolest most important person in the world.
Stage 1: Trying to act Kool
Many fans of this moron like to break down its life into many different stages where it did "important" stuff. He thinks he is so kool that at airports, when they make him go through security check, it refuses, thinking it is too cool to be caught going through it but some girl named Mina told him "Dawg, you ain't cool enough so just pass through it, you moron." This injured Bieber in the heart really badly and it went into a mental breakdown but hit went back up and restored its mentalness (sort of). After that, it wanted to prove it was cool and started going out with Selena Gomez, thinking it will get it popularity points. Selena, who refused right off the bat upon Bieber asing her out, was offered 50 million dollars. Somehow, she accepted the offer, but it was not worth the pain she was forced to endure as she lost many fans once she and Bieber started going out. They broke up and Beaver was at an all time low in its life. Luckily, the next stage of his life was beginning....
Stage 2: DeclineAfter the break-up, Bieber went down even further in popularity and fans got either angry at him for being a loser now or they were even more intense fans because they might have a chance to go out with it.. Of course the haters still wanted to kill him/her. First one happened at NYC in a bookstore. Bieber was stuck inside because his fans and haters were all outside, knowing he was in there, hiding. Eventually, a fan got sick of waiting and threw a bookshelf at the window of the bookstore, letting everyone inside. Bieber was almost killed in a stampede but escaped. thumb||There were other occasions also but they are full of gore. Eventually, he died at a concert when....well, just watch this instead.
- SPOILER ALERT! Eventually, he died at a concert when 3 came in, disguised as a really fat fan and threw a grenade at him. Lemme answer your own question, Justin: It's too late now to say sorry.
- Distantly related to Rebecca Black (like 50 miles or something).
- It is fat.
- It loves The Squadala Soccer Team.
- It hates life and beavers.
- It is the rival of Miley Cyrus.
- It is stupid and an idiot. Perhaps if you're cool enough, you could just call it a stupid idiot.
- Unfortunately, it is more successful and wealthy than all of us losers combined. I know, that's just dandy.
- Its voice is known to kill anyone who hears it. Siren is apparently jealous of Justin Bieber.
- If you listen to it, you are probably dead right now.
- He also has his own theme song, which you will die after listening to it.
- He is in love with SpennyBoi
- He took the name of Despacito from the Despacito Spiders, odd creatures that live in Roblox. The Despacito Spiders got so pissed that they shoved him down a toilet lined with saw blades and flushed it. Unfortunately, he respawned again.
- He has Lyme disease.