Humans

Humans
Humans proving themselves to be the smartest beings in the UnUniverse.
Classification
Scientific name	Homo sapiens
Traits
Intelligence	Sapient
Hair color	Varies
Eye color	Varies
Average height	Varies
Average weight	Varies
Edible?	I'm calling the police on you.
Taste	Beef
Alignment	Stupid
Enviroment
Habitat	Everywhere
Natural range	Everywhere
Time alive	Something BC - The end and beyond...
Preys upon	Anything
Is preyed upon by	A lot of things.
Stats
Conservation status	Least Concern
Powers	The ability to make weapons
UnRank	900

human.. i remember you're genocides.

— Sans

human.. i remember you're genocides. Sans

I'm only human, after all

— Humans

I'm only human, after all Humans

Humans are basically a highly developed species of monkey, though 'highly developed' isn't really saying much, as humans are in fact some of the dumbest species that inhabit the UnOmniverse. They make up most of its population. However, they are ends in themselves, and not means to something else. We are unsure if they will still be living on Earth in the near future because they keep on blowing themselves up.

Humans are very fond of Pie, and are immune to its effects.

Animals, furries, and Floogals call them "hoomans".

Description and origin

Humans started out as some cave dwellers and tent makers way back in the early to mid Pleistocene, some million or so years ago. For a while they lived in southern Asia and all of Africa, but eventually spread across the planet. A few subspecies existed, such as the Neanderthalers, known for their great strength and heavy brow ridges, and the Denisovans, known for being a sister group to the Neanderthals, and ours, Homo sapiens sapiens-the one which all modern races come from. We took over and assimilated the other subspecies until ours was the only one near the end of the Ice Age. Afterwards, civilization expanded and took a modern form, with cities and farming popping up all over the world near River Valleys. Writing was made and the rest is history.

Humans are generally not the brightest, however there are exceptions. They are really good at making weapons. They invented the original shotgun. Humans are often smaller than houses, but larger than mice (not counting Mickey Mouse). They usually have two eyes, a nose, a pair of ears, hands, feet, and sometimes have a skeleton holding their body up. Humans can be identified mainly by usually having the capacity to be intelligent creatures, but almost never living up to this potential.

Man-made humans

Humans are currently trying to figure out how to make humans with CRISPR-Cas9. The ultimate goal is to be able to reliably make physicists, but right now, they're trying to master biologists. They're also trying to cause a singularity.

The jocks claim that it is already possible for humans to create humans, through a process they call "sex," but this is widely believed to be a hoax.

Monkeyness

Humans are considered a type of monkey. The reason is because they look like other monkeys like chimpanzees, macaques, and emperor tamarins. They also share 101.0000000000000000000000000000000000001% of their DNA with other monkeys.

However, for some odd reason, humans seem to have an obsession with denying the fact that they are monkeys. The specific word for humans that are like this is young-Earth creationists.

Currently, none of The Eye Monkeys are humans. However, this will most likely change in the future as more and more humans realise that humans are a type of monkey.

Animalness

Humans are a type of animal. The type of animal that humans are is monkeys.

There are a group of humans who like to draw and cosplay as humans that have features of non-monkey animals (mainly wolfs, foxes, dragons, cyborg rats, and King Harkinian.) These humans are known as furries. Almost everyone hates them because 90% of them are cringy and bad.

However, there are some furries who draw and dress up as non-human monkeys. Those specific furries get a pass, since they draw good yet less popular animals like monkeys, rather than dumb, cringy, and overrated animals like wolfs and foxes (no offense to actual wolfs and foxes; they are fine, but furries that draw and dress up as wolfs and foxes are bad.)

List of humans

• Taylor Swift
• Mario
• Luigi
• You
• Me
• NOBODY
• Chuck Norris (king of everything)
• Justin Bieber (don`t know)
• Mister Kooperton (actually a Koopa)
• C2
• C3
• C4
• Rebecca Black (semi-human)
• Britney Spears
• Somebody
• Ducky`s true form
• Bush
• Barack Obamaaa
• McNotGuyver
• Sarah Palin
• And many more

Man-made humans

• Josephine Skriver
• Gabe (disputably a god)