I declare UnAm'rica free of Charges from yond evil UnBritain, enwheeling Washing Machines too!
—George Washingmachine, announcing their Secession from UnBritain
George Washingmachine (known by gym instructors as George Washington) was the first president of the United States of UnAmerica and a washing machine activist. He waged war against UnBritain with an army of farmers and cleaners, and together they pwned UnBritain and kicked them Bri'ish out of UnAmerica. This made the people of UnAmerica happy, and they made George their president for being such a washing machine fan. During his time as president, he ate DINNER... With Tide Pods.
George Washingmachine was born on February 22, 1732 out of a washing machine. He was, well, an accident. Not really an accident, it's just that he went out of his mom's belly accidentally while she was putting clothes in.
History
As said above, George Washingmachine was born on February 22, 1732 out of a washing machine. To go into more detail, let us read a news story from 1732.
Panic and Confusion sweeps Virginia the present Day as a local Mistress accidentally pushed out a Baby. The Lady nam'd it "Ge'rge Washingmachine". The local Mistress wast putting H'r Robes in the Washing Machine, at some Hour suddenly H'r abusive Husband did push H'r onto the Washing Machine. Instead of being hurt, the Lady hath felt a sudden Tranquility.At which Hour the Mistress did look down H'r Eyes wenteth from dry Sorrow to h'rr'r as the Lady did see a Baby, still with its Womb uncut. Since the Incident the Mistress hast Anon div'rc'd the Sir and hast gainedeth local Fame f'r this incident.—Local Newspaper Front Page from 1732
To put it shortly, George Washingmachine was born after he was forced to push out. It is really weird how he was famous even before he was born, but who cares?
However, Things were even more lucky for George Washingmachine because he had been born into a rich family! Born into a family of dishwash makers, this was certainly another reason for George's fascination with washing machines and other washing Stuff (the first being he was born out of a Washing Machine).
George Washingmachine was once still a normal boy. However, in 1744 he decided to undergo a slow transformation to become.. a living Washing Machine. Dun Dun Dun!
Ever since his slow transformation he enlisted in the British army... for some reason. He was disappointed by the fact they were fighting against the Mime Cannons (They were fighting against France) and not the French army, so he left the army.
In 1762 he foundeth out about the cruel prices of washing machines for colonists (Come. On. 9999 UnDollars for a low-end washing machine? Not a steal.) which was actually secretly part of a ploy made by The King (not to be confused with King Harkinian) to force colonists to do hard labor for best quality clothes. George Washingmachine actually found this out, and so he gathered a group of farmers and living washing machines to rebel against the Bri'ish. They grabbed their NES Zappers and marched to protest.
While they were peacefully protesting, a Bri'ish guy punched a colonist. This made the colonists very angry, and so they declared war on UnBritain. No more nice protests; they were waging war FOR REAL.
Many washing machines and farmers were lost in the Battle of Washingmachine. Tide liquid and blood was spilt, metal and body parts were falling from the sky like rain and sky, but ultimately did the machine-farmer alliance prevail and the Bri'ish scurried away like rats compelled by bug spray.
George Washingmachine was appointed as the first ever president of the U.U.S 2 years after the battle for being such a cleaning machine fan and for being a noble goodman.
Notable Things done by George Washingmachine
- Eating all the Tide Pods so that Nobody had to
- Executing all rogue machines
- Making prices ever so cheaper
- Letting Nintendo situate their headquarters
Death
Sadly, as all legends die, Washingmachine died too, specifically in the year 1799. He died the same way he was born; he was pushed. In this case a Bri'ish lover infiltrated the presiden't office and pushed him over. Doing so broke George's metal head and he sadly died in the repair center. A large memorial was held for him and he was stored in a facility and the murderer was sentenced to death by glamour.
His funeral was held inside his childhood home, and inside the washing machine that he was born from.
LIBERATION OF WASHING MACHINES!!
JNCQWEJCQKLEE@DW@UH J#@W~DIOJ#FRIOGUGJOIGT%IG^I
Trivia
- George was stored in a warehouse, where he still rests to this day.
- George Washingmachine was a Washing Machine!
- His dishwasher wife was lost in the Battle of Washingmachine.
- It doesn't really make sense how people were angry that they couldn't get washing machines and other stuff when they could just use George.
Execution by Cleaning
George Washington extends his metal robot arms and pulls you inside him. He then starts spinning you which results in blood loss and slowed down heartbeat. He then proceeds to release tide liquid into the machine which instantly poisons you.
Execution by Cleaning
George Washington extends his metal robot arms and pulls you inside him. He then starts spinning you which results in blood loss and slowed down heartbeat. He then proceeds to release tide liquid into the machine which instantly poisons you.