WaJail is grim and dismal place where criminals are held for their crimes. It is also the temporary home of people who disobeyed the Ten WaCommandments for when they DIE. WaJail is the biggest institution ever with 120 different classrooms, 70 different teachers, 6 courses of garlic, and 35 angry Wario clones serving as "wards".
There is all sorts of crap to prevent inmates from having fun, rioting, or escaping: like the hundreds of metal detectors, alloy detectors, gas detectors, metalloid detectors, and plasma detectors that cover every square inch of the facility, not to mention the amount of cameras that rival the CCP.
History[]
WaJail was founded a really long time ago, in fact, Wario had to go back in time to build WaJail. He and his brother Waluigi constructed it under what would later become Hell, like a century before when Christianity was founded. They were the only two to actually work on it because none of Wario's slaves were strong enough to carry bricks.
It was one of the first Waligious structures to ever be built, as Wario wanted people to warship him instead of God. Being made with tools from the future, WaJail for the longest time was one of the most luxurious places to live. Though eventually the "make people worship him" idea eventually died off, and the present caught up with him, leaving him with only the prison. But thankfully he's seen enough prison shows and a playthoughs of both The Escapists and Prison Architect to know how to run a place. He called his clone-guards "wards" because a trick he learned on YouTube about French.
Currently, only 5 people have successfully escaped WaJail, and the other 4,019 were killed. (That's because he also hired lots of Snipers.)
Sentencing[]
WaJail sentences are usually 10-Your whole life years long, depending on which commandments or laws they didn't follow. Inmates who don't eat their garlic get an extra week, and are forced to consume all the garlic that they didn't finish all at once. After their sentence is over (and are left with WaPTSD, anxiety, depression, harvested organs) they just go on parole, or to Hell if it's a "your whole life" year sentence. However there is one immortal guy going for the high score of infinity; we suspect he might be insane or extremely bored.
Living Conditions[]
It's basically just maximum security + solitary confinement all the time. The inmates are crammed in tiny cells with no regard for their well-being, and are subjected to brutality and human rights violations on a daily basis. Guys get harassed and beat up for not being up to Wario standards of phat when they're literally starved to the bone. Even the bravest and most hardened prisoners are reduced by weight to mere shadows of their former selves. There is no chance of reform or redemption inside WaJail, only punishment and torture. Even when the wards use lethal force and kill you, you still can't escape because you spawn back in your jail cell because it's Hell.
Cells[]
The cells were a last minute joke added in by Waluigi. Originally Wario had wanted everyone to pile on top of each other like in an epic wrestling match, but he was convinced to make them cruel and unusual instead. Besides the constant noise and spikes on the floor, it's pretty standard; cells are limited to 7 feet length, 7 feet width, and 10 feet tall with no real bed or pillows (not even a dakimakura [body pillow]). They only a toilet, a terrible sink, and a "fart button" which plays fart sounds. Some inmates get too attached to their giant bed brick and have to get it replaced with a big cinder block instead.
Daily Schedule[]
The daily schedule for inmates consists of the following:
| Every day except Wednesday | Wednesday | |
|---|---|---|
| 12AM | Sleep time | Sleep time |
| 1AM | Sleep time | Sleep time |
| 2AM | Sleep time | Sleep time |
| 3AM | Sleep time | Sleep time |
| 4AM | Sleep time | Sleep time |
| 5AM | Sleep time | Sleep time |
| 6AM | Sleep time | Sleep time |
| 7AM | Wards wake inmates up. | Wards wake inmates up. |
| 8AM | Wards start to slide 6 garlic under doors. | Wards start to slide 10 garlic under doors. |
| 9AM | "Eat your garlic" time. | "Eat your garlic" Time |
| 10AM | "Eat your garlic" time. | "Eat your garlic" Time |
| 11AM | "Eat your garlic" time. | "Eat your garlic" Time |
| 12PM | Wards check to see if inmates ate their garlic. | "Eat your garlic" time. |
| 1PM | Cell time | Wards check to see if inmates ate their garlic. |
| 2PM | Cell time | Cell time |
| 3PM | Cell time | Cell time |
| 4PM | Cell time | Wards start to slide 12 garlics under doors |
| 5PM | Wards start to slide 7 garlics under doors | "Eat your garlic" time. |
| 6PM | "Eat your garlic" time. | "Eat your garlic" Time |
| 7PM | "Eat your garlic" Time | "Eat your garlic" Time |
| 8PM | "Eat your garlic" Time | "Eat your garlic" Time |
| 9PM | Wards check to see if inmates ate their garlic. | Wards check to see if inmates ate their garlic. |
| 10PM | Hammer time | Hammer time, where the inmates get hit with a hammer 4 times. |
| 11PM | Sleep time | Sleep time |
Trivia[]
- Inmates consume 100 garlic per week.
- It's 435 garlic a month!
- That's 5218 a year!
- Inmates constantly complain about having to eat garlic within 3-4 hours. (Why wouldn't they?)
- After the inmates constantly complained about garlic, they replaced garlic with cinnamon rolls for a month, which the inmates preferred a lot more, being the first thing in years they've eaten that wasn't garlic. But then they all got diabetes and so concerned for their health, Wario sent all the chefs who made cinnamon rolls for the inmates to WaJail and gave them back their garlic.
- After the inmates constantly complained about garlic, they replaced garlic with cinnamon rolls for a month, which the inmates preferred a lot more, being the first thing in years they've eaten that wasn't garlic. But then they all got diabetes and so concerned for their health, Wario sent all the chefs who made cinnamon rolls for the inmates to WaJail and gave them back their garlic.
- Inmates may not keep cups in their cells because of The Fish Incident of 1366.
- Wario is the warden. (duh)
- Wario himself was once sent to WaJail!
- The only people to have been banned from the jail are Raichu, Wakko and Scotch, due to their "break-all-rules" nature (they were given the boot).
- It once tried to contain WaHorrortime Tubby but the insane Wa clone burst through the wall like the Kool Aid Guy and escaped.
- Special agreements with King Frost have been made so that anyone banned from The Frost Dimension comes here instead of the Cadbury Prison Jail Factory.