|Fatman is a WANTED article!|
- They once called me just a fat moron. But I was more. Much, much more. I was THE GREATEST FAT MORON EVER! I put on a costume, and declared I will now be known as... FATMAN! Protector of the overweight!
- —Fatman, right before getting hit over the head with an anvil
Fatman is a Super Fat-powered superhero character that lives in Possum City. He was originally a regular fat moron named Bruise Pain, but he got a costume that actually fit him, and became Fatman. Ever since then, Fatman has been
running rolling around crushing bad guys and hippies underneath his fat rolls of doom.
Fatman's history is largely unknown, but some IS known. That's right, we actually discovered a history on someone. Bruise was just an eight year old kid who had a disorder that caused him to be unable to lose weight, so he had a very healthy diet, it was like how most lives go, when some man came up, and killed his parents. He vowed revenge, but first he decided he was hungry. He went off to find some broccoli, but couldn't, so he ate some fast food as a last resort, but the sugar and salt and fat was too good for one fry, so he ate, and ate, and ate until he was overweight to dangerous levels.
He kept eating until the hole in his heart where a love for his family used to be was filled. however, he couldn't fill the hole, and his food fetish continued for a long time until he decided to stop to get a beer. He amazingly survived, and decided this was a sign there must be more to his disorder, and decided to be a superhero by the name of Fatman. So, he paid three million UnDollars to get enough fabric to actually make a costume that fitted him. He did that (sort of), and started waddling around the Possum City streets to stop crime. After that he just ate McDonald's. I mean literally. He swallowed the entire building.
We'd tell you more, but we don't feel like it.
Fatman has Super Fat, an amazing power that lets him roll around, crush people, and eat so much food, he can shoot puke bombs at people.
He is also strong enough to lift four tons, just by using his fat. If he gets fatter, he would be able to lift more, but might die as well.
Fatman is famous for using advanced equipment to help him when his fat isn't enough:
- Fatarangs - Boomerangs that are SUPER fat
- Fat pellets - Smoke pellets that make people inflate
- Fatknife - A sharp knife that can hack through even the thickest fat
- Fataling hook - A grappling hook so strong, it can even hold Fatman for a few seconds before it snaps
- And several other fat devices that are not very important like the Fat Spork (it's just a normal spork, except ten times bigger)
Other UnDC heroes
- Stupidman - came from the planet Crapton; can do pretty much anything, but is REALLY dumb.
- Wonder "Woman" - a creepy dude who became "the world's first """""transgender""""" superhero" to spy on women in washrooms.
- Green Flashlight - can be killed by THE COLOR YELLOW. Enough said.
- The Flesh - is almost always naked, and developed super-speed to avoid being arrested for indecent exposure.
- Aquamon - a rejected Digimon who joined the UnJustice League for no reason.
- Spitter-Man - was bitten by a radioactive spitting cobra, and gained the power of spit.
- Irony Man - has a deadly sense of humor.
- Captain 'Murica - was created by the U.S. Army "Stupid Soldier" project, and is the world's first redneck superhero.
- Spastic Four - four superheroes with useless powers: Mr. Spastic has the power to chimp out, The Human Water Gun has the power to spray water anywhere, The Thong has the power to be mistaken for a woman, and The Idiotic Woman has the power of feminism.
- Listerine - drank a whole bottle of mouthwash, which made him grow assamantium claws.
|Fatman and Related Nonsense|
|Fatman - Fat Robin - Fatgirl - Fat Hound - Bitewing - Officer Weirdo|
|Not So Good Guys|
|The Poker - Cat Lady - Calendar Man - Poo Face - Bane of Losers - Creepy Mask Man - Pile of Goo - Croc Head - Anti Fatman - Man Fat - Mr. Cold - Pen Guin - The Guy Who Asks Too Many Questions|
|Fatmobile - Fatplane - Fatboat - Fatarang - Fatcave - Possum City - Super Fat - Fatman Theme Song|
|Fatman: The Movie - Fatman 2: Return of the Fatman - Fatman 3 - Fatman 4: Yet Another Fatman Movie - Fatman 5: Get a Life - Fatman 6: Seriously? - Fatman 7: Enough Fatman Movies - Fatman 8: I Hate Fatman - Fatman 9: For Crying Out Loud Stop - Poker|
|Fatman: The Shame - Fatman: The Shame 2: Really? - Fatman: The Shame 3: We Aren't Going to Tolerate This - Fatman: The Shame 4: The Quest For More Money to Buy Food - Calendar Man`s Shame - Fatman Advance - Fatman Advance 2 - Fatman Advance 3|
|Fatman: The Show|