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UnAnything Wiki
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Box Art - front

Box cover

EarthBound is a SNES shame made by Nintendo in 2008 to try to popularize off of the success of Ness in Super Smash Bros. Brawl. It features Giygas and Evil Mani-Mani as they stop Ness from eating peoples faces off.

Story[]

Ness skipped taking his antipsychotics since he knows that his family is stopping him from having psionic powers, thus becomes a schizophrenic and enters a fugue state, declaring himself the chosen one, beginning his world-cleansing mission against all who are "impure".

Giygas and Evil Mani-Mani realize capitalism can't work if everybody is dead, and so, like the proletariats they are, launch a death campaign against him.

Shameplay[]

You roll the dice each turn to move around the shame board, trying to land on every battle square so that you can cleanse the world of evil. Various angels descend from Heaven to take your picture, but this only slows you down.

You fight Porky Minch multiple times throughout the shame; he keeps coming back with more and more goons for you to beat up.

Killing Evil Mani-Mani makes the shame easy since he's the one making everybody kill you.

The shame ends once you kill everyone and take use their damned souls to go to the past and kill Giygas in his Giygas Cave.

Secret Modes[]

Based off the town names in EarthBound Beginnings are lotsa different modes where you play as other guys from other shames trying to stop or help Ness. Most of them are unbeatable.

Valentine[]

You play as the president of the United States of UnAmerica, Funny Valentine. Your goal is to be as corrupt and accept as many bribes as possible, whilst maintaining the status quo, spreading United States propaganda, and quelling dissent. You don't even meet Ness in this route.

Easter[]

You play as MX in this one. Your objective is to kill Ness by any means necessary, though, unlike the other routes, you can't gain any powers; instead limited by the starting kit. If you join Porky, you can go to the future as a pigmask and kill Lucas.

Thanksgiving[]

In Thanksgiving mode, you play as The Noid. Your goal is to prevent Pizzaface from being delivered to Ness by the Escargot Express. It plays a bit like Yo! Noid and a bit like Team Fortress 2's "Payload" shamemode.

Mother's Day[]

You play as Phone Guy trying to avenge Ness's Mom. Your goal is to make as much money as possible, and give all that money to Uncle Sam who's making weapons of mass destruction to try to kill Ness. This shame mode controls like Papers, Please. The shame ends when Ness kills you.

Reindeer[]

In this shame mode, you play as You and you just watch movies all day on Rainierland. Since this shame has only 4 megabytes, you just look at You while random sound effects play. The shame ends when you starve to death because you are too lazy to leave your house.

Halloween[]

You play as Varik, a disgraced hero/vigilante who wakes up to read in the paper that a serial killer named "Ness" is on the loose. This mode is the most extensive out of the 7 secret shame modes, and is the most different in terms of shameplay:

Varik can move 8 directions through various town maps, just like the last shame (except movement is no longer grid-based), and can also fight enemies and unlock new weapons to get stronger, with 7 days (lasting 24 minutes) to prepare for Ness. Fights take place in Ness's encounter format.

Once Varik kills Ness, he is sent to the electric chair (because you've killed so many guys to become stronger than you stronger than Ness). In hell, you fight Dr. Andonuts who's mourning his son and calls you a queer slur.

Snowman[]

This mode crashes on stage select. The Cutting Room Floor says that this was a mode where you play as Santa Claus firing coal missiles at Ness until you either win or run out, like an on-rails shooter shame, but no code in the actual shame suggests this was ever real.

It crashes because of something to do with it using an early version of the Super Scope, that it reads a "short" instead of a "byte", overwriting code with illegal instructions which crashes the shame.

Ratings[]

  • This shame is the only Nintendo shame to be rated AO by the ESRB. It wasn't always AO, because it took 5 years to find the grusome Noid death sequence.
  • Bikini Bottom Ratings gave it an E rating, before changing it to LP.
  • Wario Ratings already gave it an X rating because they thought the Halloween mode was a bit extreme.

Trivia[]

  • You can make Ness temporarily break in his psychotic episode by feeding him some DINNER.
  • This is the only shame that you can ice cream and chew apple sauce in.
  • All RPG shames that came out after this one are based off of this because it's just too good.
  • EarthBound was the first shame to have 4 save slots.
  • It's the only shame to actually be funny.
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