You can already hear the airhorns.
Doritos are the ultimate MLG snack for only the dankest. However, since nobody cares about MLG anymore, practically no one eats them. However, King Isopod and the isopods absolutely LOVE Doritos and will do just about anything to eat them. Luckily, half the time they can't even get into the bag. He sends them from the Isopod Dimension to Earth to get Doritos. He eventually plans to eat the UnMultiverse's supply of Doritos, and the only two standing in his way are Hank Hill, who also wants to eat all the Doritos, and Penn Jillette, who wants to destroy them all. They go very well with Mountain Dew. Ironically, they had nothing to do with the Great Isopod War. There are actually a wide range of flavo- oh crap, my keyboard's covered in Dorito dust... I need to stop eating these. Sorry, let's continue.
The Birth of Doritos[]
I told you they like Doritos...
Most people assume that Doritos were created by Frito Lay, but that's not true at all. So I will inform you on what REALLY happened; long, long ago, back when the UnMultiverse was 420 years old, Chuck Norris was doing whatever Undefeatables did when the UnMultiverse was 420 years old, but then saw a huge MLG supernova. This was a truly monumental occasion, as it would be the only time ever that a MLG supernova was made. Out of the blast, Chuck Norris found something special; the first Dorito. When he tried it, he was shocked by how average it tasted (He's Chuck Norris. MLG is not an option to him). So, without the willpower to simply roundhouse kick it, Chuck Norris threw it into the stars, into an infinite time loop.
By the time this time loop finally ended, the Dorito had split into two. One was flung eons in the future, to a century before modern Earth, where a pathetic company called Frito Lay found it, analyzed it, and claimed it for their own, making many copies. The second Dorito landed in the Isopod Dimension, straight into the underwater palace of King Isopod. When he ate it, he was shocked. IT WAS, BY FAR, WITHOUT QUESTION, THE MOST DELICIOUS THING HE'D EVER TASTED AND EVER WOULD TASTE. King Isopod loved it so much, he built a trans-dimensional teleportation machine (which took him until modern times to complete) to find out where it came from. He never did find out, but by this time Frito Lay was popular worldwide with their Doritos. I would twll you moer, but by ths time there;s so mucj dust on my kryboarf I can;t eben se tje kwys anymoe.
The stuff in Doritos[]
- Dead children
- Blood
- Gasoline