Hey ladies! Want a hunka hunka liquid cool?
—Cool Guy, trying to flirt
Coolius "Guy" Capri, known most often as Cool Guy, is a liquid creature who comes from Cool Land. He often stays in the shadows and waits for night clubs to open, so he can show off his dance moves to people who'd otherwise flee in terror from him. He's very suave and smooth, but horrible at flirting with women due to the fact he's... well, a liquid man, which causes them to be scared of him.
He loves to sing as well as dance, and has a voice similar to that of Neil Cicierega (who he's completely unrelated to). He can sometimes cause trances in people as he sings, but the symptoms of it are usually just feeling buzzed and wanting to get a taxi home instead of driving. He's pretty fun at parties, though.
His origins are shrouded in mystery, but its rumored that he was summoned from another dimension by a woman named Juno, who was extremely lonely and wanted a man who'd want more than just her homework answers.
Cool Guy has also been known to be a frequent enemy of the Top Hat Mafia due to his sheer coolness and criminal ability. If they steal something and it's left unattended, Cool Guy takes it behind their backs and adds it to his personal collection (or just gives it to The British Museum). He's akin to the non-internet version of a troll.
Cool Guy's Likes[]
- Music (especially EDM and 80s smooth dance)
- Capri-Suns
- Karaoke
- Showing off to people (which is a plea to be paid attention to)
- "Is This Love?" by DaYeene
Cool Guy's Dislikes/Fears[]
- The G-Man
- Kool-Aid (and Flavor-Aid)
- Being looked at like he's crazy
- People not paying attention to him
- Standing still
Trivia[]
- Although he says he likes Capri-Suns, he also says it's "against his religion" to drink them (for context, he's affiliated with Heaven's Gate, which does not prohibit Capri-Suns)
- When asked about Juno, he calls her a "disciple"
- He is wanted in the state of Ohio after attempting to take over Coolsville (and failing)