Now it's my little cannon, against little ol' you... let's see who wins.
Kaptain Skurvy has deemed that this article is out of line with the generally accepted UnAnything Wiki canon. Please edit this article to have it fit in the wiki's canonical timeline or see the relevant discussion on the talk page. Otherwise, another lizard might come in with a much larger, more dangerous cannon and suck it up!
Now it's my little cannon, against little ol' you... let's see who wins.
Kaptain Skurvy has deemed that this article is out of line with the generally accepted UnAnything Wiki canon. Please edit this article to have it fit in the wiki's canonical timeline or see the relevant discussion on the talk page. Otherwise, another lizard might come in with a much larger, more dangerous cannon and suck it up!
Bob Bogan is the founder and ruler of the Final Destination, he is also a member of the Unbeatables. He is the son of Undefeatable Father Bogan and brother of Atlantis emperor Bulk Bogan.
Shortly after his birth, as a 32 year old, he was kidnapped by the Squadala Man to become the new hero of Koridai after Link died. He later went to HELL and fought Chuck Norris and became super powerful, leading to Final Destination's founding.
Life Story[]
Bogan was born in the Bowser UnWorld Territories permanently aged 32. He was significantly dumber than his brother, so mostly wandered aimlessly. As the mitosis baby of Father Bogan he naturally posessed the same muscular complexion despite not retaining any powers, which caught the eye of Squadala Man.
After Link died (Squadala Man didn’t know he could respawn), a new hero of Koridai was needed. Squadala Man kidnapped Bogan and brought him to the Squadala Empire, where he trained up Bob for 70 years before finally bringing him to Hyrule.
Bob, being a Bogan and what not, immediately forgot everything Squadala man told him, and went journeying on his own path. He went to the shop for some food but bought a bunch of swords insteads, taping them together after sticking the blades in the plentiful piles of Hyrulian horse dung.
Bob immediately went around West Hyrule stabbing people with his diabolical contraption, catching the attention of the citizens of Hyrule, who got their revenge and brutally attacked him.
They were either gonna kill him or throw him into Jail, but they all soon ran away as Ganon came to investigate whatever the hell just happened.
There's no way someone who's trained in the same military and has the same weapons and equipment with Ganon would have done such as horrible job at his... job.
Ganon took it into his own hands, he'd turn Bob into a force of true evil.
He summoned demon and got it to possess Bob. The demon ended up killing Bob and then forced Bob (now in hell, since he’s dead and did bad things) to become as the leader of the demon army for 999,999 years.
Ganon told people how his new “friend” Bob would soon come into his power, why he had to be the leader of their army.
While dicking around in hell, while everyone thought he was ruling an army, he came across a dead guy named Phil Nye.
Bob thought from talking with him, Phil was a nice but suspicious...
As if Bob hadn't given a damn enough about the demon crap already when he made so much of the fact that he was on the chopping block, this further angered Phil for god knows why.
Bob finally convinced Phil to help him look for a way out, and they did that by descending the layers of hell looking for a fire exit.
They started this long journey by cursing each other because they could not see through the air to get further down.
After a long time, the pair finally arrived to the bottom, underneath the 11.5th circle. Phil had a broken shoulder from having to climb down and Bob had his leg broken, but when he climbed up he got some kind of an injury and had to retire.
Turns out, anything bellow circle 11.5 is just the UnOmniversal Void, so Bob decided to leave Phil behind for a minute as he drifted down into the void. He wished to plead with the almighty Chuck Norris for his release from hell.
As you can guess, he didn’t have time for his shit and purged him from the UnMultiverse, leaving Phil behind with a broken arm in the bottom most layer of hell for eternity.
Bob soon found him self in the omniversal zone of complex, imaginary-numbered and quaternion universes. this is a group of universes outside of the UnMultiverse (and in the UnOmniverse) that have imaginary numbers, and can only be accessed from non-imaginary 'verses by using one of the 2 types of imaginary plotholes: 4-dimensional plotholes, which are VERY unstable and often collapse and/or explode, or 10-dimensional plotholes, which are very unlikely to collapse or explode, but are also very hard to get rid of.
Bob, now in this weird place, did what he’s best at doing, dicking around. He went straight to the edge of infinity, from where he was told he was no longer a part of the UnMultiverse, where he should be the centre of everything. In this place he discovered that he was immortal.
Turns out, by purging him from the UnMultiverse, Chuck Norris had actually made him more powerful then he ever was before, due to the fact he was no longer restricted by the laws of physics.
Bob, now with the power of several gods, went and returned to the UnUniverse, where Chuck's dimensional barrier no longer had any affect, (not that he couldn’t handle him chuckself) and he was no longer trapped within it by his own power alone.
Chuck Norris, realizing his mistake, then called up all several other gods, sent a message telling them what he planned to do, and created a new universe which they'd use to battle Bob, and stop his nefarious antics.
This universe was Teliki Filonikia, which to this day is still used for god level dueling.
Against him, was every god and demi-god.
They waged war for centuries, as all universe fell into chaos due to the lack of gods. Every hit and punch and kick was with the force of 2 hyperverses colliding.
Bob wasn’t the strongest, but it’s clear he couldn’t go down easily. He soon, taking inspiration from his brother (not really since he doesn’t even know him) being the hero of kvatch and all, screamed “Fus Ro Dah” and blew every living thing out of Teliki Filonikia.
All though it’s clear the gods have the capability of killing Bob, it’s quite clear that it’s an incredibly troubling hassle and is probably too much to deal with.
Bob resides in Teliki Filonikia and will take on anyone who wishes to fight him. He allows gods to fight there, not like he has a choice.
Trivia[]
- Bob Bogan has been an officer in the Royal Australian Army since 1987.
- Bob Bogan hosts a talk show called "The Talk".
- Bob Bogan's biggest goal in life is to create a beer that people will never ever want to drink.