The Scenic Town Of Bikini Bottom
Bikini Bottom at some point in the pasta
Bikini Bottom also known as Taylor Gang Country (formerly known as Garbage World and before that Crap County and Sexy Bikini Town in Japan) is the main setting in SpongeBob SquarePants. The city has a proper population of about OVER 9000, but the entire metro area (including Crap Fields) has a population of One. The city consists of various businesses, including restaurants, stores, adult entertainment, pawn shops, and manufacturers. The city has a stable economy, a horrible education system, questionable health care, flimsy labor laws, an unstructured government, and a corrupt law enforcement system. But after the Mizukage's hostile takeover, Gengetsu Hozuki made Bikini Bottom better.
Location[]
Bikini Bottom is located at the bottom of the sea, and if you do not know that, you are an idiot. In the center of Bikini Bottom, the citizens are forced into slavery and are forced to live in large, gray buildings made of metal. There are some other forms of buildings, mostly depressing crap shacks. Further out from the town citizens need to use whatever is available and struggle everyday to survive. If you're lucky you'll find the Hidden Mist Village 2.
Inhabitants[]
Most of the people who live in Bikini Bottom are crazy nut jobs. It is home to some of the weirdest people ever to walk this planet. There is a demented man named Tom who is addicted to chocolate. There is an old lady who looks like a dead snake who remembers when chocolate was invented. There is a greedy bastard named Mr. Krabs, who charges ridiculousness prices for his mediocre food. And Darwin Watterson! Who is literally a freaking fish with legs!
What more can you say? That the beast Utakata defends the city with his tail?
Education[]
The President of Bikini Bottom once said that "education is useless!" Following this statement, they tore down all of the schools and no one has learned anything since then. And anybody who tries to teach education or learn is sentenced to the millions of underground concentration camps. but after his death by the hidden mist village the second Mizukage reestablished the education system saying that "education is useful for learning the giant clams genjutsu"
There's a Boating School, but Spongebob Squarepants never passes, though he once did get his Sea Legs, which is rather good.
Health[]
The well-being of an average Bikini Bottomer is not good at all. They all suffer from either mental instability, drug addiction, depression, or dementia. However, there are no nuthouses as anarchy fish burned them down.
Culture[]
The culture of the city is horrid, at best. The only art is graffiti and Squidward Tentacles.
Media[]
Bikini Bottom's former president, Darwin Watterson.
Bikini Bottom has no reliable sources of media, only MSNBC.
Politics[]
Government[]
Bikini Bottom's government, although uncertain, is set up just as it would be in any corrupt country. In comparison to American cities, Bikini Bottom appears to lean more liberal. After the Mizukage took over, citizens leaned republican.
Law[]
There aren't that many laws in Bikini Bottom, but despite them there are hundreds of criminals. A good amount of them are dumb, which contributes to the number of law breakers.
Crime[]
Bikini Bottom has large crime rates because of the heavy presence of maniacs, psychopaths, and over working bosses, along with the Sponge Gang. Gang violence, Drug Dealers, grand theft and murder are in every possible street. but it's low because of Utakata and the hidden mist police force
Establishments[]
There are no reliable establishments in Bikini Bottom, other than a few pawn shops and gun stores, and eateries and banks.
Residential Evil[]
Bikini Bottom has many houses. Many of them contain zombies, hell hounds, and giant spiders. All of the main characters wish they had enough money to own one. There is also a residential community called Testicle Acres, where only Octopi can reside.
Hostile Architecture[]
Most houses are condemned due to safety hazards and/or crimes committed by the house.
There buildings are very bland and have no artistic skills. Like none, there just giant bent up pipes from sewage outlets. However it should NOT be underestimated their violent nature. What mad scientist gave the houses brains? We don't know, but now they are capable of using weapons like guns, just like those who live within them.
Hidden Mist Village 2[]
It's a secret hideout where all the ninjas live. It was made after the Hidden Mist Ninjas took over in the future. It is modeled after the first Hidden Mist Village.
Cuisine[]
They eat fish food and the gay fish eat fish sticks.
Entertainment[]
- Adult Dancers
- Adult Films
- Firing Ranges
- The Krusty Krab (It's a food restaurant that occasionally hosts films)
Health[]
Bikini Bottom's Hospital was built by the Umbrella Corporation. This what it looks like on a typical day.
Bikini Bottom has its own health department and several hospitals open for its residents who deal with mental instability. Since the city has a large obesity problem, suicide booth sizes have been doubled.
- Bikini Bottom Hospital
- Weenie Hut General
- Super Weenie Hut General (shut down too)
- Suicide Booths (shut down after the Mizukage took over)
Exercise[]
- None, a lot of people in the town are fat.
Environment[]
Bikini Bottom is the most ghetto underwater city in existence. Even more ghetto than the Underwater City Of Atlanta.
Wildlife[]
Bikini Bottom has a certain range of wildlife such as Marajuana plants. These plants, when smoked, make the smoker incredibly annoying. This is most likely the reason Spongebob acts the way he does.
Animals[]
In Bikini Bottom, animals are treated with much neglect. Dog fighting can be found in almost every dark alley.
Climate[]
It's as hot as Hell in Bikini Bottom.
Disasters[]
Bikini Bottom has been destroyed at least ten times. SpongeBob has been responsible for two disasters: the pie bomb and crossing the beams.
Timeline[]
- 2128 BC: Patrick Star time travels and has to take a crap and craps out the first Krappy Patty.
- 1593 BC: Bikini Bottom begins construction.
- 1482 BC: Mr. Krabs manifests out of dark matter.
- 1128 BC: 465.2323124th anniversary of Bikini Bottom.
- 1043 BC: The Mystical Calzone Alliance enslaves Bikini Bottom.
- 674 BC: Patrick establishes the Mash Potato Gang to stop the Mystical Calzones.
- 432 BC: The Mystical Calzone Alliance gets asploded11!!
- 1102 AD: Darwin Watterson becomes president.
- 1696 AD: The Krusty Krab is established.
- 1789 AD: The Chum Bucket is established.
- 1978 AD: Bikini Bottom War begins.
- 2183 AD: Bikini Bottom War ends.
- 2453 AD: The ugly barnacle goes on a murderous rampage.
- 2501 AD: Everyone died. The end. (That didn't help at all)
- 2747 AD: The Place gets rebuild as a much more stable place.
- 2791 AD: Shortly after the peace area Anarchy Fish took over and ruled.
- 2805 AD: Utakata arrives to train with Squilliam Fancyson
- 2962 AD: Bikini Bottom's second and final war begins.
- 3007 AD: The war ends, leaving Bikini Bottom in ruins. Darwin fakes his death and moves to San Andreas.
- 3020 AD: Bikini Bottom gets rebuilt by its citizens.
- 3024 AD: Gengetsu Hozuki takes over as president and tries to fix Bikini Bottom. Utakata and Kisame Hoshigaki rebuild the city since they have future technology.
- 3025 AD: Dog fighting becomes outlawed. Suicide booths are shut down; efforts of replacing them with therapy booths begin.
- 3027 AD: Former suicide booths are reopened as therapy booths. Delicacy clam restaurants sponsored by the government open to the terror of mollusc residents.
- 3030 AD: 72 gyms open across the city, and the government forces all the fatass fishes to go lose weight.
- 3031 AD: Ninjutsu Training Academy opens.
- 3032 AD: Rehab centers and nuthouses are made to help the Bikini Bottomers with their mental health; these are guarded by P-Rank Hidden Mist Ninjas.
- 3035 AD: MSNBC is replaced with Fox News.
- 3078 AD: All the Hidden Mist Ninjas succumb to drowning, leaving nobody to maintain the government.
- 3146 AD: Bikini Bottom is nuked due to popular demand. Few escaped.
- 3600 AD: An order to rebuild the city is put into action.
- 3608 AD: Bikini Bottom is fully rebuilt and hidden under wraps for the rest of it's known existence. Gatling Groinks made to protect the municipality from outside forces.