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Not to be confused with the thing from Fortnite

Battlepass is a family of legendary German tanks built during Vendetta and Adolf's time. They feature the most modern and advanced technological aspects not seen by anyone. These are perhaps the last good things German Engineering created because they were designed by Albert Einstein since Vendetta paid him a ton of money to do so.

They served in the War of 1812, World War I, Anglo-Zanzibar War, The Forgotten Great War, Stupid Cat Revolution, World War II, The Old War, War of 2012, 1st Ducky War, 2nd Ducky War, and World War III. The Battlepasses have had a lot of users. These things have a lot of war experience and could teach everyone a thing or two about war, such as how to teach your children to kill the enemy during wartime.

Almost every country would use these things after World War 2, but only Germany would use these during WWIII because of Marguerite Williams. The 1100 years before WWIII saw the Battlepasses being slowly phased out in favor of the Russian KV-222222, T-90Billion, and IS-6900 Berlininator. During WWIII, Germany and a bunch of other countries were inspired by the old Landkreuzer Ratte land battleship, but this time, everyone had the technology to actually build those huge things.

The Russian family is called T-tank, and it is much older than these and had not ended after the eighth iteration, so some are younger than the Battlepass. Some T-tanks are even a part of the Battlepass family albeit adopted (stolen).

Battlepass Mk 1: Battlebaby[]

Battlebaby

It sneaks around!

The Battlepass Mk 1, aka the Battlebaby, is the first tank in this series. It is a light tank meant for frontline action because the deceptive size and speed make it look like it has no armor, but it actually has 122 mm of armor which can withstand everything the enemy could throw at it. Unless, of course, the enemy gets on top of the tank because it has a weakness of it just having a tarp for top turret armor makes it so that the two crew members can get killed by artillery, small guns, and fists.

Vendetta Williams wanted this thing to be a small and armored vehicle that also has recon and command capabilities, so she asked Albert Einstein to design this all-purpose little tank. It has extra thicc, big chungus armor, fast speed, but it only has a 5 cm pea gun that could only destroy something like the Heavy Tank M6! Yes, that's right! The tiny peashooter has the power to kill the M6! This is because the armament uses asplosive propellant, allowing the boolet to be flung at incredible velocity.

During Hitler Germany, Adolf Hitler used this thing for propaganda. He wanted parents to buy this tiny tank so they could teach their children how kill the invading Communists. It came with an instruction manual on how to fire the gun, drive the tank, and steamroll the Soviets. Children all over the world would drive the Battlebaby and kill the opposing nations. Basically, this caused a resurgence of Total War doctrine, as in not just the soldiers, but the men, women, and children too participated in war.

Battlepass Mk 2: Battlebuster[]

Battledicker

It has two eyes

The Battlepass Mk 2, aka the Battlebuster, is a tank with no turret, but it had a big gun. It had the ability to destroy entire houses with its 17.7 cm cannon. Basically, it's a howitzer gun put on a tank chassis. it had extra thick "turret" armor, even thicker than the Mk 1, but it was super slow since it was designed to be a defensive tool.

To make such a blowy-uppy projectile, Albert Einstein designed the bullets to have Tubby Custard inside of the warhead. Collecting enough Tubby Custard to make a battalion of these things would be impossible, so Vendetta just allowed only one Highly Asplosive bullet to be on each Battlebuster created. Eventually, Germany's Tubby Custard supply would run out, so they just used gunpowder with a ketamine additive to make the shell Highly Explosive.

Adolf Hitler wanted this thing to be able to attack French and Russian cities and bunkers, so he got the thing a new engine with 1000 horsepower that would make it move at 14 mph instead of the original 7 mph. The modified Battlebuster could destroy anything the Soviets threw at it, but this thing had the fatal design of being open top! This meant that the extra fat chungus armor meant nothing when the Soviet soldiers got behind it!

Eventually, way after WWII, due to technological advances, the Battlebuster got the ability to Koopa­back­dash­wave­slide Hover­walk­moon­land since some users found out that making a thing so heavy could make it go super fast.

Battlepass Mk 3: Battlecheese[]

Battlesmad

Don't let the Cheese touch you!

The Battlepass Mk 3 Battlecheese is a tank made to solve the problems of the Battlebuster. It also has no turret but this time, it was completely closed, so no Russians could shoot the crewmates when they got behind the tank. It got less armor, it got less profile, and it got less big gun. But this was a good (temporary) solution to the Battlebuster's problems.

It has less armor, so it became the fastest tank ever. It became able to outrun everything that wasn't a T-34-85 since it could only go 60 mph while the Soviet tank could go 85 mph. But recent innovation of the Battlebuster made it go way faster than the Battlecheese since it couldn't Koopa­back­dash­wave­slide Hover­walk­moon­land.

The Battlecheese couldn't destroy entire houses like the Battlebuster, but it could still destroy an entire room full of soldiers. It got a smaller gun which improved the reload time drastically and allow it to engage more tanks than the Battlebuster.

The small profile made this thing able to hide in the bushes. It was also super hard to hit because it was so fast and so low profile. Most rounds from enemy tanks would hit the top of the tank and bounce off.

It was named Battlecheese because this is the first time the Battlepass family got official names instead of just being also known as. Albert Einstein tested the waters of this official naming thing by naming Battlecheese, just to see how Vendetta would react. She didn't hate it, so it kept the Battlecheese name.

Battlepass Mk 4: Battlecat[]

Battlepass

It's so fast that the motion blurs!

The Battlepass Mk 4 Battlecat is the first heavy tank of the Battlepass family. It was Germany's greatest tank for a time since it was well armored, had good speed, and epic firepower. It would attain mythical status due to propaganda, but that would be cut short due to the Battlepass Mk 7.

This is the first design that was supposed to have a general role on the battlefield. Vendetta wanted this thing to be able to quickly assault objectives, quickly defend objectives, and quickly kill objectives. Albert Einstein designed the Battlecat to be a simple beast of a tank that could do what Vendetta wanted it to do.

Soldiers really liked how spacious this tank was. It is also the tank where over 50% of riders actually felt safe in it. The only other tanks that could do that were the battleship tanks used during WWIII, which would be created about 2000 years later after the Battlecat.

It had thick armor all around, but the sides weren't thick enough to defend against somethings like the T-34s. French and Italian tanks couldn't do anything against this tank, though.

Battlepass Mk 5: Battlewedge[]

Battlehunt

A common hunter of tanks

The Battlepass Mk 5 Battlewedge is the tank-killing evolution of the Battlecheese. It was actually designed just to fight tanks since it came with no high explosive rounds.

Vendetta was inspired by the T-34 tanks' sloped armor, so she wanted Einstein to design a tank with even slopier armor. The Battlewedge got 76 degree angled armor and even thicker armor than the Battlecheese. Because of that, this tank has the second best armor capability out of the Battlepass family.

It has an engine that allows it to go 76 mph, the fastest of this family. The engine was the most sophisticatedly designed engine of its time, having 1810 horsepower while being only 8 cylinders. It was able to do that because the engine uses asplosive liquid instead of normal gas or diesel. Zhe Germans were able to get a surplus of Tubby Custard by simply just buying from the Teletubbies. Vendetta thought war was the only option to get the Tubby Custard, but someone told her that tons of gallon jugs of Tubby Custard were up for sale on Amazon.

It has a 76 mm cannon that can destroy any tank by using the armor piercing round, which was the only type of round if you remember.

Battlepass Mk 6: Battlestep[]

Battlepassw

Technological advancement has made Germany too powerful!

Bumps

Walking mode Battlestep

The Battlepass Mk 6 Battlestep is the first walking tank ever invented, that wasn't just Hans hiding under a cardboard cutout of the Battlewedge while making machine noises. (That was just a demonstration!)

This was the most advanced tank ever for over 2000 years. It had the ability to walk omnidirectionally or drive on the tracks. Only Einstein could design such a thing and he would've made a design for the Americans if it weren't for the stinking rich Nazis!

Soldiers did not like how much motion sickness the walking mode caused. It was like they were on top of a subwoofer playing Polish thickbass. Many soldiers got concussions, broken spines, and broken butts because of how rough the walker mode was. Soldiers who drove this thing would suffer PTSD while walking to work or driving a car when they hit a pothole.

This is the last design Vendetta would see because she would be is kil when she got shot dead before Battlepass Mk 7 would be created.

Battlepass Mk 7: Battleregler[]

Battlepass4

This thing is scary!

The Battlepass Mk 7 Battleregler is the heavy tank design that was inspired by the Battlecat. It features four guns for added firepower. It is also the first tank design that Hitler approved. This is the tank that would reach mythical status among historians and gamers after WWI.

Hitler asked Einstein to design a tank that had the ability to kill four tanks in very quick succession. Einstein designed it to have four barrels instead of using an autocannon because those weren't invented yet and it wouldn't be as cool as having four guns. Einstein wanted it to be very similar to the Battlecat but have the ability to carry the heavy stuff. So, the tracks were widened and basically everything got bigger.

It fit six crewmembers, the most until the Mk 8. The Battleregler had extra completely thick armor that allowed the thing to shrug off shots, only from the front side again. This thing stored a lot of ammo since it was so big and needed to be able to shoot at four times the speed. So, when this thing got hit where there was ammo, it produced a giant explosion that could destroy a house. Hitler wanted to keep that weakness so the blast could kill the enemy if they got up close with some stolen Panzerfaust or something of the like.

Battlepass Mk 8: The Battlepass[]

Battlefridge

The Pinnacle!

The Battlepass, codenamed Battlefridge, is the last tank of the (true) Battlepass family. Approved by Hitler, this thing shows the difference of Hitler's and Vendetta's tank doctrine.

Hitler wanted a superheavy super tank that could defend and attack anything. He wanted it to have a 15 cm main gun and 7.5 cm secondary gun. The tank had to be 200 tons with at least 50 cm of front and turret armor. Hitler was actually inspired by the Russian KV-2's mobile gun fridge on-a-tank-chassis design. He told Einstein to make it like a KV-2. Einstein designed it to be the simplest design yet because of how heavy the armor would be. He made the tank really long because it obviously needed a boat engine to move it.

The pinnacle of German Engineering, The Battlepass actually didn't need a boat engine to move it. Rather, it was so heavy that it inherently had the capability to Koopa­back­dash­wave­slide Hover­walk­moon­land. It is actually dangerously fast and takes an airstrip for it to decelerate. For that reason, it was used to head straight Moscow during WWII without stopping. However, the Soviets had already invented another unstoppable Koopa­back­dash­wave­slide Hover­walk­moon­landable force called the KV-VI.

A Battlepass Mk 8, on the way to Moscow, and a KV-VI, on the way to Berlin, were taking the same road that connected the cities, so they rammed into each other. The KV-VI was like a ramp for the Mk 8, so The Battlepass flew straight over Moscow and into the Arctic Ocean. The KV-VI accordioned into itself, or it telescoped into itself. Using accordioned made no sense there, (not) sorry.

Battlepass M[]

20231124205053 1

Poopenfartenschittenpissencummenfuchenwagen is the full name

The Battlepass M, known infamously as the Poopenfartenwagen, is a WWIII panzer that was designed like the previous Battlepasses which was extremely stupid. It has a very big gun and is average sized in comparison with the real Battlepasses. Compared to the contemporary tanks built during this thing's time however, the Poopenfartenwagen is lacking in everything. Serious slowness, lacking size (that's not what she said), no firepower (again, that's not what she said) and most importantly, not a single cupholder.

Marguerite Williams, Nazi Führer of Germany, is the one who designed the monstrosity all by herself. It is inspired by WWII German tank design, which, if you know how that went you would know why this was a terrible idea. She thought such a thing would impress Adolf and the other evil führers, but it impressed everyone in the worst way possible, Hitler even lectured to her about something that does not matter.

No one liked this tank except for Marguerite (she liked it TOO much). Soldiers lived in fear of getting one shot by literally any weapon and getting rolled over by the giant battleship tanks that roamed around. This failure made everyone embarrassed for Germany and is also the only Poopium rarity tank in War Thunder; it being the only tank shamers get paid for unlocking, which happens when players first click install. It is so bad in that shame that it only fights World War I tanks.

Users[]

Everyone that was not Russia or Soviet Russia (except the M, only Germany used that).

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