UnAnything Wiki

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Wa-hoo!

Banjo

Breegull!!!

Kazooie

gu-huh!!

Banjo

Banjo and Kazooie are the bear and bird duo that nobody expected from the shame Banjo with a Kazooie. A cute shame that was really meant for stupid little children who had a Nintendo 64 and parents who hated Conker because the cute cartoony little squirrel said fuck in his very own shame! They were also the mascots of Rare for a very long time until Microsoft swooped them up and made them fat bastards.

Story[]

Once apon a time there lived a bear and a bird who lived on Spiral Mountain for HUNDREDS of years playing Shame Boi. When Banjo's sister named Tooty got bearnapped by Gruntilda Banjo and Kazooie went off to beat her, and beat her on repeat (hay look! A rhyme!) and save his sister. After they though Grunty was DEAD she came back, as ummm, ahead. She was quickly defeated and for 8 years peace reigned in Spiral Mountain.

Fast forward to Nuts and Bolts, Banjo and Kazooie are FAT AS ALL HELL and are only playing Xbox 360 and eating Pizza whilst JamJars plays his dumb "Spiral Mountain FM" radio whilst Conker music plays on it. BUT THEN HOLY DAMN GRUNTY IS BACK!!! Her skull appears James Bond style (because Banjo is owned by Rareware and they made GoldenEye 007, one of the best shames ever made) and challenges them to race her. Whoever wins owns Spiral Mountain forever. Banjo won and since then has never had another shame in his name except when he was added into Super Smash Bros. Ultimate and then his first shame was ported to Switch Online Expansion.

Ever since, peace reigned in Spiral Mountain and they have never been heard from ever again. If is unknown if they are alive or not. The fans want a new Banjo shame but I doubt that will happen in our lifetime. We don’t like you Microsoft!

Personality[]

Pah! What do silly moles know about jumping?

Kazooie

Banjo is probably the friendliest bear you'll ever meet. That is, unless you happen to piss him off. Kazooie however, is extremely rude as she always calls Bottles names. Never harassed JamJars however, even though that was one of her nicknames for Bottles.

According to Kazooie herself, JamJar's muscular appearance scared her into leaving him alone.

Trivia[]

  • The worst Banjo with a Kazooie shame was a featured article on the English Wikipedia!
  • Banjo actually originated in Diddy Kong Racing. We don't know how he met Kazooie however, Rare and Xbox won't tell us!
  • Kazooie actually got to sit inside a B-17 Bomber, Banjo got to be strapped to the wing. Thanks Mattel Electronics!
  • The bird might be the word, but what about the Kazooie?

Gallery[]

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Honeyberry and Wings

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Honeyberry and Wings

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