- This is the bank robbing aardvark. If you were looking for the TV show, please go to Wikipedia.
Good morning everyone. Would you be so kind as to give me all your money? Arthur Read every time he robs a bank...
Arthur Read is an aardvark who used to rob banks and was very polite about it because he’s Canadian and asks if people are kind enough as to give him all their money.
Contrary to popular belief, Arthur is not a member of a certain gang made by a certain duck. Instead, he’s a member of nothing! In fact, the Elmo Gang kicked him out because he didn’t use force to commit bank robberies and they refuse to mention his name because of that.
Now unhappy with life, Arthur tried reaching out to the Hank Gang so he could join but was quickly denied because he doesn’t use a Tommy Gun to rob banks and instead politely asks. When he got detained he vowed never to rob a bank ever again.
However, they never said anything about robbing an UnAmerican bank so he went to the UnUSA and formed a robbery group and proceeded to rob a bank with the members and got Un$250,000 from doing it. He was caught again breaking his promise because they updated their policies without him knowing but they kept telling him “check your eMail”. He checked his eMail and saw an update to his policy saying all banks are off-limits for robbing so he said “fuck it” and gave up. He now lives on his own in the middle of nowhere and lives off unemployment cheques, Mountain Dew and Doritos. But doesn’t smoke Weed because he doesn't smoke shit because it's very bad for you. He once had a repair shop where he "fixed" red ringed Xbox 360 consoles but what he did was drown the system and give them a Play Station 3. They were mad and once the truth came out they beat up his stand.
Arthur was understandably upset about this and did an amazing job resisting the urges to rob banks again, instead he donated Un$100 to a charity and his honor was restored. Arthur kept donating to charity, got a girlfriend, moved out of his hellhole trailer into a mobile home and more stuff to raise his karma. Now he is a good citizen who donates 10% of his paychecks to charity.